Monday, September 16, 2013

Yes, I was shocked, I thought u forgot, but I don't know man, I should just back it off ab- ALOT. like damn when did I even have this fekkin inf- UGHHHHHHHHHH.... and I cant tweet this fek.. actually you know what? I kinda expected that already.. and u know what? although although what Im feeling, although so, I kind of feel the peace of God just rushed into me, and I don't feel as hysterical anymore, yeah, to be honest I maybe sad and stuff and all but hey, that what I get for falling into raging hormone's hand.. I guess im just disappointed that it isn't me..WELL, LIFE's LIKE THAT.. gotta just embrace it sometimes.. you've got no other choice . Like Gurl, look here, he's had his fun, the thrill of talkin to a gurl and now that u're close and he knows u'll give in , bend in to this friendship, it gets broing, gets stale, no effort needed to impress, to get the attention cus he knows u will always be there .. and now he's just flinging u aside hangin u on a rope till he somehow needs u again, and cus ur dumb and stupid , a fool for that guy...

seriously when things like happens , I ve got no idea what, what to do.. sometimes I get the feeling like im the someone most ppl are taking advantage of..

but hey I know that it's not all true..it's not all true.. it's just my side of the exaggerated story

tt's why I wouldn't wna trust and hold ur promises in my heart, take what u said all seriously, cause hey, you'll change ur mind, ur perspective and I don't wna be hoping on nothing when I can actually see that's nothing is gonna come out from u. I don't wna be all over you, like yeah, ur my bestfriend, but I know where I stand when it comes to things, so I choose not to over react although inside , im lika a lil kid whining and cryin and stuff, but it wont matter.

It's the end im gonna see, and it's the end, God will bring me through this uncertainty..

like hell would I know what this phase of life is gonna teach me, just gonna have faith for now and trust that, i'll come out of any situation, broken from the inside by God, broken, and stronger.



Then again, now that he is not on my list, I don't think I should bother thinking about all these impossible stuff no more right?

haha I can concentrate more on creating and exploring on my arty farty stuff.......

who am I kidding, really.

it's positive, but I need a motivation for it.. haha

God I really need you man

I need you to help me with Guarding my Heart and only pouring it out under you.. let me learn to rely on you in times of worries and troubles like guide my thinking and stuff.. cus I cant do things on my own..

I really need to get into the habit of planning and QT-ing damn i should



ANYWAAAAAAAYYYYYY, I gotta go, got a card I should be completin'!


i played a melody at 10:47 PM
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